happy new year!

So yes, I’m writing this post four days into the new year, but in all the craziness of a new year, this is the first morning I’ve had the time & prerogative to pause & write.

In January of 2012, I read a post by Nova Ren Suma about her private, personal New Year’s Resolutions (for a full recap of that, and how she did in 2012, read this post here). She posted pictures of her numbered resolutions, but didn’t tell us what the resolutions were. Well, I loved her idea and followed suit on this blog here.

#1 Res#2 Res#3 Res

I don’t even remember what these say, to be honest, which is probably a sign of poorly kept resolutions. I do remember them being very broad, and not very easy to keep, which is a sign of my not often making resolutions in the first place. But, I’ll open them up & then be very honest about how poorly I really did in 2012 on keeping my private, personal (and sadly, forgotten) resolutions. (In my defense, I did carry them around with me in my daily planner, but I probably should have looked at them more often.)

#1 reads . . . Finish the manuscript draft of my novel.

HAhahahaha. This did not happen. Not even close. But something a little better did happen: I stopped feeling guilty about letting the novel, outlined but unfinished, sit to the side for the year. When I entered grad school in 2011, I did so knowing I wouldn’t want to use my free time to write a novel; I love writing, but I do so much of it for school that when free time comes along, I usually fill it with TV watching, sporting events, and exercise. In 2012, while I did not actually write my novel, I did something I intended to do from 2011 when the story & characters danced enticingly into my mind 3 weeks before grad school began: I gave it (and me) room to breathe. Sure, I still took time to jot down new notes, to try out new scene & dialogue constructions, and other little, fun, novel-writing things to keep me in tune with the story when I had time. But I learned not to feel guilty about sticking to my other pursuits in life, like graduate school, which is a major time and mental commitment. I also remembered how to enjoy relaxing, instead of feeling like I was failing as a writer; I took the time to learn something new, something I’ve always wanted to learn (ballet) and I got back into something I have always loved, and always done (competitive soccer).

In 2011, writing ceased to be any fun at all and felt like a constant competition against my writer friends. My friends did nothing at all to provoke this because the feeling was all within me. Still, it sucked, and I dreaded writing. In 2012, I stepped away from writing almost completely, and it was really the best thing I could have done despite this first resolution. In 2013, I don’t know what will happen for my writing, but I’m feeling more hopeful this January than last.

# 2 reads . . . Meet blog deadlines on MHLit and my personal blog.

Well, I sorta met this requirement? Until fall semester, I did very well blogging here on my personal blog, but after that, it was a lot of cricket chirps. But still, significantly better than I had done any previous year on a blog, so this is improvement, and may the improvement continue!

I left MHLit early in the year because I finally admitted something else to myself: I really don’t like writing so many book reviews. If I have something I really want to say about a book, then yes, I’ll post a quickie review, but otherwise, I just don’t want to do it. This made me a terrible fit for a book review blog.

However, making the decision to leave MHLit did give me the time to join up with six other women to launch a new blog site, NA Alley. The Alley promotes New Adult literature, and it has been a great space to blog and it’s been a really fun working environment with the ladies. I did, in fact, not miss a deadline for the Alley, though being me, I did post everything exactly AT the deadline.

# 3 reads . . . Read my To Be Read pile.

See, this is one of those awful resolutions because it is just not possible to complete. I will never, ever finish all the books I own that I haven’t read because I will always buy new books. This is just how it goes.

All in all, 2012 was the year I stopped lying to myself and, therefore, stopped feeling guilty about lying to myself. I remembered that grad school is, in fact, right now, more important to me than writing a book. I admitted that I don’t like writing certain content for blogs, and most of the time that is reviews of any kind. I prefer discussing books, movies, television, etc. over posting my opinion because my opinion can and does change as I talk to people about the things I love, hate, or don’t care about much.

Other things that happened in 2012: I finished my first year & a half of graduate school, and I was approved for graduation this coming May! I got engaged to Boyfriend, so now he is Husband-to-be! I made new friends, I reconnected with old friends, and I lost a few friends, too. 2012 has gone on a good note, and I’m excited about 2013. I suspect it’s the year I really begin to feel like an adult.

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4 Comments

  1. I really want to do that note thing, but I know that I’ll just throw them away while cleaning and totally forget the entire thing.
    This year is going to be fantastic though. So many big things going on and so many projects to complete. It’s exciting.

  2. this is SUCH a cool idea and i might do a little list for myself and keep them somewhere like you did. i love how you’re able to turn these unmet resolutions on their head and show off how hard you’ve worked, how much you’ve grown, all while being totally realistic about your year. i can’t wait to see (a year from now!) what you resolved for 2013!

    also, i’m so jealous that you did ballet this year! i have absolutely no grace/flexibility/dance ability, but if i could be anything, it would be a ballerina. you should post about your experience with dance (photos and all)!

    love you, of course. can’t wait to follow along through 2013!

    • this comment made my friday, nicole! i’m doing another little set of these for 2013, and i think i should manage making more achievable goals. but we’ll see at the beginning of next year, i guess! i do plan to make them on prettier stationary, though, because pretty paper is a great motivator.

      i think you would be surprised about just how much grace & flexibility you *do* have, if you gave dance a try. i was told to do something like dance to strengthen a chronic injury i have, and i always wanted to do ballet, so i signed up. by the end of the semester, i could do a lot of things i never would have guessed! and i’m taking it again this semester, so i’ll try to get some ballet-centered posts up for you!

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